Life is a complicated. Pleasure might be sought by one and rejected by another. There is a twist to everything. The pear fruit might be tasty but the letters that form the word may leave a bitter taste in your mouth. Look closely, you see P.E.A.R. I see R.A.P.E. Nobody likes that word. It is akin to murder in many ways. Several women have had their lives destroyed by it physically, mentally and emotionally. It is an abomination in every society. In Ghana, a culprit can spend up to 25 years in prison for engaging in this absolutely reprehensible act.
However, many men are uncertain or rather erroneously assume certainty on what it actually means to say that a person is guilty of committing the crime of rape. Under Section 98 of the Criminal Offences Act, 1960 (Act 29), rape is the carnal knowledge of a female of not less than sixteen years without her consent. From this definition, there are 5 things that every man should take note of before deciding to know a woman biblically.
- There is a very thin line between being ON and being IN
If a woman allows a man to brush his penis on her vagina without going in, he is guilty of rape if the D accidentally slips into the V. It does not matter how deep he enters. Section 99 of Act 29 says that all that is required is proof of the least degree of penetration. In the case of Valentino Gligah & Anor v The Republic where two police officers were accused of raping a trader who hawked second-hand clothes, Justice Dotse of the Supreme Court declared that so long as there is penetration beyond brush work, there is carnal knowledge. This means that you are a millimeter of pleasure away from destroying your life in a second. If you think knocking on an open door without entering is a risk worth taking, I wish you Godspeed.
- She need not say NO but she must always say YES.
Before you stop reading this piece out of anger, I am not saying you are rapist just because the woman you slept with last night did not explicitly say Yes to sexual intercourse. Nonetheless, the circumstances must point to the fact that she agreed to partake in the sexual act. The mere fact that she did not pose a struggle does not absolve you from liability. The mere fact that she was silent throughout is not a defence. In the English case of R v Olugboja, an Oxford student admitted to having sex with a woman who he prevented from escaping. His lawyers argued that since she did not struggle, resist or scream for help, she could not claim she was raped. In fact, she even took off her own trousers at his request. However, the English Court of Appeal still found him guilty. Lord Justice Dunn contended that: the question now is simply: at the time of the sexual intercourse did the woman consent to it? It is not necessary for the prosecution to prove that what might otherwise appear to have been consent was in reality merely submission induced by force, fear or fraud. In other words, the fact that she did not say STOP does not mean you will go scot-free.
- It does not matter whether you were the best she ever had
Despite the tone of my introduction, a woman can be raped even if she enjoyed it. In fact, if she even had multiple orgasms, you will be guilty of rape if you did not secure her approval. The law is not punishing you for giving her pleasure. It is punishing you for forcefully giving it. She need not indicate discomfort or cry in pain. It matters not whether she had any injuries. According to Hoffman in his article entitled, “Voluntary Sex Causes as Many Vaginal Injuries as Rape”, women experience vaginal injuries at quite similar levels in both consensual and nonconsensual acts of sexual intercourse. Again, Bower and Dalton in their research paper titled, “Female Victims of Rape and Their Genital Injuries”, show that less than 27% of women who are raped suffer genital injuries. Put another way, the presence of lubrication is not the absence of rape. The key word is “consent”. Be warned my brethren. Take my counsel. Forget Counsellor Lutterodt!
- She must be wide awake and in the right frame of mind
First of all, you are a rapist if you sleep with a sleeping woman. Once upon a time, a young man named Young was convicted for doing the exact same thing. He literally had the balls to have sex with an unconscious woman whose husband and two children were sleeping by her. Chief Justice Coleridge, without any hesitation, declared that it was clearly an act of rape. A woman cannot accept an offer of coitus because she does not know that that offer exists. Leave her to wonder in dreamland. She did not ask you to give her real wet dreams. Let God do that for her. Also, do not give her alcohol or drugs to heighten her feelings and disrupt her mind to go crazy for you. She must be able to decipher between right and wrong, left from right, two fingers from three. If that is lost, you are as doomed as Cosby. You may spice up her bottle but you would have bars to think about.
- You can rape your wife
Gone are the days when marriage meant a complete license to copulation at any time whether consensual or not. Section 42(g) of Act 29 which prevented revocation of consent among married couples has been repealed! Today, the bride price or dowry you paid does not give you the right to turn your wife into a sex machine. If she was begging you to make love to her on Monday night, it does not mean she cannot refuse you on Tuesday morning.
Beware of how you eat PEAR because you might end up engaging in RAPE. Every woman is different. Do not use the positive reactions of your Ex to determine the affirmations of the woman you are about to spoil bedsheets with. Some women may change their minds even if you have already entered. That sounds wicked for the man whose pleasure is at stake. However, the law does not care the dickens about that because the ravishing of a woman is a more wicked act. The law cares about the next decision you’ll make. Another thrust would leave you holding bars when you do not stop like she asked. If you pull out, however, you can live in peace another day.
By Daniel Ewusi Awuku